Seasons of Life

Oh, hello Blog! Long time, no see!

There are two main reasons for my absence:

1.  I’ve been having a love affair with Instagram. Unfortunately for you, I think he will be sticking around for a while.
For this season of my life, it is just more convenient. But don’t worry, I’ll still visit on occasion.

2.  I have actually had this post written since February, but for some reason Blogger wasn't letting me post anything. Lame.
So pretend this was 2 months ago  :)

My life is quite different now.

I’ve decided that I don’t really like change.

I like to find my place, find my people, and then settle down there…. maybe forever  :)  

But, for better or for worse, life is not usually like that.

.  .  .  .  .

By my senior year of high school, I had found that spot in life.  
I was busy with Yearbook deadlines, choir trips, play rehearsals, and wandering the high school halls.
I was comfortable with my friends and who I was. I loved high school.

 

When I began college, I had a little bit of a rough start.
Someone (who will remain anonymous) offered her words of wisdom to me,
and I am so glad that she did because I have reflected on them several times throughout my life.

She told me: “You don’t like college because you liked high school.”
She continued, “It’s true! You either get to like high school, or college. You liked high school, so you’re not going to like college.
That’s just how it goes.”

My first thought was, “Well why didn’t someone tell me this before I decided to like High School!
I think I would have rather liked college, and now I will never get the chance!”

Then, my ever-logical brain kicked in. Why can’t I enjoy high school and college? Is it so crazy to believe that you can enjoy two parts of your life?
Yes, they were different, but I was sure there could be good in both.

Thankfully, I realized this was some pretty bad advice.
I’m glad that she said it though, because I decided right then and there that I would always enjoy whatever stage of life I was in.

Like the seasons, each has something unique to offer, but all are beautiful.

.  .  .  .  .

I grew to love college! I had my place and my people who were like my second family. I had experiences that made me stretch and grow as a person.
I organized activities, went to concerts, had prank wars, made toilet bombs, and traveled around Europe.
It was even better than high school!

As graduation came closer, I started to panic.
I was losing my place. I was losing my people! I didn’t want things to change!
My life would never be this good again.

And then I remembered that bad advice…. And I remembered how stupid it was.
I thought, “Allison, your life is going to be different, yes. But your life can still be good.”

.  .  .  .  .

So, I moved to Logan.
That was a hard transition.

My 23^rd Birthday was a few months after I moved there, and it was the worst ever.
I was nowhere near where I always thought I would be when I turned 23. I was supposed to be an “adult” and I had no idea what was going on!
I was struggling to find direction and purpose in my life.

I had no place. I had no people.

But I held onto the thought that it could still be good. I worked hard for that good.

Again, I found a new place, and a new second family. I grew in ways that I would not have been able to otherwise.
I loved meeting new people, potluck, movie nights, game nights, impulsive adventures, Murder In The Dark, and talking with roommates until 2am.
I loved this stage of my life! It was the best!

And then I got engaged.

.  .  .  .  .

Don't get me wrong, I wanted to get married! But it was change.
And the biggest change that I had yet to experience!

I remember one night, sitting in the car and crying to Clayson.
I loved living with roommates! Who would help me put together an outfit for church?

Again, I heard those stupid words going through my head.

I didn’t have to choose between my single life and married life. This was just a new season.
Both could be good! Different, yes, but soo good.

.  .  .  .  .

I settled into married life.

I love spending every day with Clayson! We made dinner together, took walks, weekend trips, and watched the Jazz play basketball.
He has even gotten pretty good at helping me with my Sunday outfits! 
Life was perfect!

I loved going to work. It was my place and they were my people.
We had inside jokes, went to lunch, flew to Denver, and had girls days.
I loved it!

And then I found out I was pregnant.

.  .  .  .  .

Like marriage, this is a happy change, but it is change.

I have always wanted to stay home and raise my children.
I have never questioned that, and we have been blessed to be in a situation where my dream could come true!

But, I suddenly wasn’t sure if I was ready for that.

The idea of being solely responsible for the life of a tiny human was fine.
But, not working? That was scary!

I had been working for so long that I couldn’t imagine my life without it anymore. It sounded so boring just to stay home all day!
What would I do with myself? Who would I talk to? I need human interaction!
I can’t just talk to a baby all day!

And then the thought came: “It will be different, but oh so good!”

.  .  .  .  .

That change came September 30, 2015 and I am so grateful that he did!

I now spend my days talking to a baby – Telling him our plans for the day, making deals with him if he will sleep, and celebrating when he rolls over, takes a spoonful of rice cereal, or I am able to suck a particularly large booger from my sons nose.

I love it!

Yes – Sometimes I miss work. Sometimes I miss my roommates. Sometimes I miss college.

But, I would never change where I am at for anything.

.  .  .  .  .

I can honestly say that I have loved every stage of my life.

And if, at any point in my life, you would have asked me which stage was the best? I would honestly have said whatever stage I was currently in.
It doesn’t mean that any time was better or worse, just different. And all good.

I am blessed to still be in contact with all my “second families” and to relive those moments on occasion.
They have helped to mold me into who I am today.

Each stage was perfect for me at that time.

The seasons of my life will continue to change, each fading into the next. I’m sure I will be stretched, pushed, pulled, and tested – and it will be beautiful.  Although it is hard for me to imagine at the moment, I am sure I will grow to love each new season just as much, and even more!

Life doesn't stay the same forever.
And I am learning that it is a good thing.

.  .  .  .  .

But today, I don’t want to wander the high school halls, have a prank war, or explain insurance benefits.

Today I want to rock my baby to sleep and play cards with my husband.

Missin' Him Like Crazy

Wednesday afternoon, I came home from work early so I could drop Clayson off at the airport.
He is in Chicago until tomorrow night. I knew I would miss him, but I would be fine.... 

I seriously over estimated myself.

I never knew I was so needy!
I've never liked being alone, but even I had no idea how much I really need people in order to function.
I really just fall apart. I'm not handling it very well.

It doesn't help that I have somehow convinced myself that Clayson is going to die and will never return home. 

I told this to Jana and she said it was sweet. 

I think it's pathetic. And kind of embarrassing.  

I have a whole new respect for military wives or who have husbands that travel.

Thankfully, I have been blessed with amazing friends who take such good care of me!

Wednesday night, Jana took me to the store (which was so good, because I was just sitting at home thinking about horrible plane crashes and shootings in the big scary city of Chicago) When I came home for lunch on Thursday, I immediately realized it was not a good idea for me to be home alone. I called Jana and she was at my house in 5 minutes to eat lunch with me. We went to the Parade of Homes! I hung out at my old apartment and pretended to be single again  :)  Tomorrow, I'm meeting up with Krisann for lunch and I am so excited!

I really have the best friends ever!

Thanks for putting up with me, even when I'm a baby and can't handle being alone for 4 days.

The good news is I think I've gotten significantly better since the first night.... although I still have a long way to go 

This song sums up my thoughts perfectly:

The moral of the story: Next time Clayson goes to Chicago I'm going with him
so I can hold his hand when he crosses the street and dive in front of any stray bullets that are flying at his head. 

(Clayson says by the time he leaves next year I'll be pushing him out the door. I don't believe it.)

Sorry if this is overly mushy, but I can't wait to see him tomorrow night!

Turn, Turn, Turn

My room is empty except for my bed and dresser. Sunday was my last time in a singles ward. 

This week we will be in Burley for our reception and the week after that we will be married. It is so crazy!

I am so excited to take this next step in my life, but it is also a little bitter-sweet.
I have loved being single and living with and meeting such amazing people. I have learned and grown so much.

I have had so much fun!

I will miss staying up until 2 in the morning talking

Prank wars

Tetris

Facebook stalking potential boys 

Making videos at 1:00am

More Prank Wars

Girls nights

Shopping trips

Kid History 

More Tetris

Pinterest parties 

Sleepovers 

and Just being with girls.

How will I get ready for church in the morning without three other girls to help me put an outfit together? 

Girls are so weird and I love it!

I feel like a season of my life is closing and another is beginning. It will be a beautiful season, but it will be different.

I probably won't be up until 2 in the morning talking anymore, and I will miss that.
But on the bringht side, I probably won't be up until 2 in the morning talking anymore  :)

I keep having this song play through my mind:

I am one who is always looking to the future. However, I try to remember to find joy in the journey.
To live in the moment and enjoy what I have been given, because soon it will be gone.

I'm looking forward to this new time in my life and I'm so glad I can say that I have truly enjoyed the journey.
And I fully intend to enjoy the road ahead even more  :)